Showing posts with label 2 years. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2 years. Show all posts

2.28.2012

thoughts.

This will be in no way organized because I just don't have time. But I need to say something somewhere to anyone who will read.



Having a missionary is draining. Hard work. An emotional rollercoaster. Something I'm not sure why I agreed to. Overwhelming. Frustrating. Lonely. Very lonely.

Sending off a best friend, who isn't said "missionary" but someone whom you love dearly is equally as difficult as previously said.




Often times I just want to give up. I'm sick of goodbyes. I'm sick of dreaming of past memories. I want those experiences back and at my fingertips. It's frustrating and sad to know that they'll never come back but only fade away with time. That things won't be the same. That friends will drift apart and leave you behind. It's just plain HARD.


This morning I was able to attend the temple with one of my best friends who is departing for the MTC tomorrow. Just me and him. Family file names. All 25 of them completed. We sat close to each other, he would put his hand on my back, I would hold onto his arm as we walked in the snow. It's safe to say I love him.

He will be a wonderful missionary.

But sometimes, I wish goodbye and being separated wasn't necessary.





It's okay to say I've been crying a whole lot these past few days.
Out of sadness and happiness. Out of reminiscing in memories. Out of love.



Good luck, Elder Driggs. I know you'll do great things.




See you in 2.

9.24.2011

pity party.

I don't know how anyone does it.

I mean come on. Send off your best friend for a whole 2 years? No face to face contact for 24 months? 730 days without your best friend by your side every day to calm your fears?

It makes me cry every time I think about it.

I know I have about a month left with him, but that's nothing compared to how long he'll be away.

I'm still having a hard time getting used to it and believing that it's the right thing for him to do.

But I honestly just can't stand thinking about the fact he's completely shut out from the world and from me especially. It hurts me to see him so excited to leave because it seems like he's excited to leave me.

I know he's not. It just seems like it.

My mind is in a haze and has been the past two months. Time needs to slow down. I need my sweetheart longer. I never want him to leave.

Oh MG's, how do you do it?