i'm a teacher: part 2

I don't really remember what sparked my desire to teach. I really don't. It has been my childhood dream, actually, but that slowly faded as I entered junior high. By that 7th grade I wanted to be a NICU nurse. By 9th grade it was a paramedic. By 10th grade I had no desire to do any of that. For a few years during high school I didn't have any clue what I wanted to pursue in college. It hit me my senior year.

I wanted to teach.

And I actually wanted to teach orchestra.

Once I got to BYU, that changed.

At some point, I guess my childhood dream resurfaced.

Today, I got my acceptance letter for the Elementary Education program at BYU. I cannot tell you how long I have been waiting for this. When I first turned it in, they said "Expect a response before Valentine's Day. If you don't, come in and see us."

Well, Valentine's Day rolled around. Nothing. Wednesday went by too. I decided to go in on Thursday to see what was up. "They're going out today." the secretary said.

Still nothing.

Then Friday came. I had been checking my email like 5 times an hour waiting for that dang email. Then all of a sudden, it shows up.

Along with an attached acceptance letter.

I cannot tell you how thrilled I was. I have never felt so sure about a decision in my life. This is what I'm supposed to do. I am supposed to teach. I am going to make an influence in kids' lives for the better. After reading the letter, I got chills. I grinned from ear to ear.

It happens, guys. That feeling is real even though I doubted many times. But you'll know it when you feel it.

I. CANNOT. WAIT.

weekly gratitude.

It's been awhile! But here it goes:

{1} My bishop. The Atonement. The Gospel. It's true, folks!

{2} My musical talent. I accompanied for 2 ward choir practices, played the organ in my singles ward, and the piano in relief society! BAM baby!

{3} My best friend. And letters. And his example. He's the best.

{4} My mom's delicious food! Mmmm Sunday dinners.

{5} Mr. Weyand's AP Language class. And the 11 page research paper I wrote for it. Ha.

{6} Good friends that know how to listen.

{7} Money! For gas and BYU bookstore attire. Gotta love BYU sweats :)

{8} The MTC. For taking good care of my man.

{9} My neighbor who I just found out today (as I was helping her in nursery... haha that's what I get for going back to visit my home ward!) that she waited for her husband on his mission! Even though she's married and has 5 kids, I can go over whenever to talk to her!

{10} My family. I love living at home.

Missing you.

No, this post isn't about him. It's about another guy. A guy I've known for way too long. A guy I've laughed at from a distance and eventually laughed with as we sat next to each other in orchestra.

Four years is a long time to sit next to the same person.

But honestly, I wouldn't have wanted to spend it with anyone else. I miss everything about it. I miss orchestra.

I miss watching him walk aimlessly around the classroom and eventually make it to his seat.

I miss him grabbing chairs for us.

I miss his "Wait, when is state orchestra?" or "What time do we have to be at the concert?" questions that made me grin.

I miss his insane talent. I always felt small sitting next to him--that he was leagues ahead of me in skill levels.

I miss his awkward personality, his excellent and witty comments, and his half smiles.

I dunno. Maybe this is weird. But I have loved spending 4 years as stand partners with this kid. I've learned to love him and be his friend. I learned that that's what he needed; someone to understand him and be kind to him.

All of a sudden, a few hours ago, he texted me randomly. He said he had issues and was "glued to his phone right now and needed to let off steam and be distracted." The best part? He texted me.

We talked for a while. It was absolutely pleasant.

I'm gonna miss him next year at school. But hey, maybe we'll end up as stand partners sometime along the way :)